


astronomy

by snugglepup



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Post-Sburb, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-18
Updated: 2014-03-18
Packaged: 2018-01-16 04:44:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1332364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snugglepup/pseuds/snugglepup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I think having your alien friends teach you about badass new kinds of romance is a thing that everybody should get to do," he says, and you silently agree by nuzzling against his stomach.</p>
            </blockquote>





	astronomy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Anonymous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymous/gifts).



_i tried to take a photo but the instructions were all in spanish_

_so we just romped in the sand until you told me that you were famished_

_perhaps in the morning we can go out for breakfast_

_then we can crawl along the beach to look for your necklace_

_bitesize - astronomy_

 

* * *

 

"Ohhh my GAWD how long has it been now, like, a billion years?" You take a deep breath of night air tinged with sea salt, then sigh as dramatically as possible.

"How long since what? Since we've been out here, or... Actually I don't even have a reasonable guess for this one!" You look over at him and he grins and shrugs like the dork he is and forever will be as far as you can tell.

"Since I started tryin to give you a nickname, duh? None of the easy stuff is comin through for me. Like, Jo-Eg? Jo-Bert? Johnny? Eggy? Those are completely dumb as shit, you're such a doofus I can't even name you. I am not even close to drunk enough to figure this out." Shutting your eyes for a moment, you stop walking to focus. You take the curtain of black that you see and pull it aside to reveal the real void, the absence of anything, the absence even of the concept of darkness. Somewhere in that void is a can of Coke that does not exist, and when you find it, you snatch it away, open your eyes again, pop it open and take a swig.

"I was pretty sure you were done with the alcohol thing before I even met you. And I'm also pretty sure that you were planning on being done with it forever?"

"That's why this is a Coke, doofus," you say. "Oh wow, ell oh ELL okay, how about from now on you're Doofus. I so nailed it, right? You are officially Doofus, now and for-fuckin-ever." John laughs and pulls the zipper on his hoodie up a bit farther. Seeing him trying to conserve warmth, it occurs to you that it's actually really fuckin cold right now! Why did you think coming out here in a dress was even close to a good idea? Shivering is not really a thing that's fun at all and that's exactly what you're starting to spend a lot of your energy doing. "Man, gimme me a sec, I need to void out again and steal a jacket or somethin, it is all kinds of cold out here. It's like a giant snowman keeps breathin all over me and bein a total creep, like, yo dude nobody said you could do that, you're waaay too close to me in line right now, it's hella inappropriate. Snowmen are the worst, right? Like, personal space mean anythin to you, Frosty? Yeah? No? And why's this sub-zero fuckin metaphor even ON the beach? SO rude."

"Hey, hold that voidy-thing thought, I'm going to try something that's either going to end super badly or be really really cool." For a moment nothing happens, and then the cold ocean wind is suddenly gone. You look around and see indentations where he was a little bit too intense, but he didn't spray sand everywhere, which is pretty sick. You guess that's what a few extra years to practice using his powers did for him. "How's that? Any better?"

"Whoa, it totally worked. Awful slick for a doofus, Doofus." Without the wind stealing your body heat it's actually more like just pleasantly cool now. Awesome. "Isn't it gonna be hard to keep that up, though?"

"Not really! It's all kind of second nature at this point. The Breeze does what I say, it'll keep doing it until I stop wanting it to. I'm kind of super tired though? I'm still mostly used to flying everywhere and it is at least three times harder to walk through sand than it is to walk on other things." You smile and shrug, sit down facing the ocean. He sits next to you and you lean against each other.

"You know, after the last Earth I was on I thought I was pretty much totally sick of water forever? But this is pretty cool. Not havin alien robots tryin to kill you all the time seriously changes how you look at the world, right?" Waves slide in and out along the shoreline. You're far enough from any cities or really any civilization at all that there's no light pollution, so the water glitters with moonlight and the blurred reflections of stars.

"I wouldn't know but I can see how murderous amphibious alien robots would make the whole ocean thing not awesome! I'm glad that you're having a good time, though. That is kind of the whole point." Oooh, you know a chance to make things adorable when you see it and you are not letting this one slip by.

"Me havin a good time is the whole point, huh?" You turn your head and smirk and he giggles awkwardly. "I thought the point was for US to be havin a good time, Doofus. How bout you, are you havin a good time?"

"Nope! I'm having the worst night of my life. The last thing in the multiverse that I wanted was to be on a completely awesome pale-date with the cutest girl this side of paradox space. All I can even do to stay sane right now is pretend you're Matt McConaughey. Oh holy crap Roxy this is so great, look at that!" He's staring up at the vast expanse of stars and pointing, which doesn't really help at all because it's pretty much super hard to follow somebody's finger into outer space.

"What, like, the sky? That is totes your thing and all but you're takin it a little far, dude."

"No, okay, see that one weird cluster of stars? Yeah, that one, look to the left, what does that look like?" You think you know what he's talking about but it's hard to be sure... no, wait, you totally see it now.

"Oh holy shit, is that... Nooo way are we seriously lookin at a constellation of Frigglish right now. We seriously are, aren't we? Buildin your own universe is baaasically the best thing ever." Staring up at a brilliantly shining asterism of your mutant cat's face, you nestle your barely-sipped Coke into the sand off to your left and strategically flop over into his lap, staring up, looking for anything else of note. If your fuckin cat made it into the cosmos then there has got to be tons of other stuff. If you looked hard enough you could probably find Dirk making out with a pony or something. Gross. You'd make fun of him afterward but he'd probably think it was cool, the fuckin weirdo.

"Being a god is way more sweet when you don't have to spend all of your time fighting invincible masters of time or stab-happy one-armed flying furries," he says. Fingers slip through your hair, rub gently at your scalp, and dear god but is that ever nice. Man, you so landed the best doofus ever.

"Right? Oh, jeeeez, who taught you how to do that? I'm like basically gonna pass out if you don't stop. You better not fuckin stop though, for real." Another deep breath of sea air, the sound of water sloshing gently back and forth. Shit, everything got relaxing and snuggly all of a sudden. You wriggle around until you're lying on your side and more diagonally and wrap your arms around him.

"I think having your alien friends teach you about badass new kinds of romance is a thing that everybody should get to do," he says, and you silently agree by nuzzling against his stomach.

"Well, they totally can now that half the planet's got gray skin and rad horns, Doofus. Did you like, forget about that part? Cause it's definitely still somethin we all made happen."

"Oh yeah, sometimes I do forget about that. I guess spending most of my life on an Earth where aliens were fictional had some downsides."

"Yeah, and spendin most of your life hangin out in the troposphere scarin the shit outta people takin plane rides like you think you're Arthur Dent or somethin probably doesn't help either, windy boy."

"Hey, the troposphere is completely awesome and you know it."

"Oh em gee shut uuuup, you know what's REALLY awesome?"

"Probably! I like to think that I am pretty good at knowing what's awesome."

"You'll neeever guess this one, seriously."

"Okay, so what's awesome?"

You twist your neck as far as it'll go so when he looks down you can at least halfway meet his eyes, even if strains your spine a little.

"You're awesome, you fuckin doofus," you say, and he looks surprised for the two seconds before he decrees that no, you are in fact the one who's awesome, and then he starts to tickle you and you screech and push away, get on your knees and pounce on him and show him what a REAL tickler can do, and all you can think about is how this is pretty much a billion times better than you ever would have thought your life could be, sand everywhere and hilarious constellations overhead, no villains to keep track of, no quests of terrifying importance, no wondering if every second might be your last, just you and this precious dork giggling and rolling on the beach in the eye of a gentle storm.


End file.
